I am called Fahad

I am called Fahad, born 1999 in Kampala district. As I turned 14 years, I started developing love for my fellow boys and after few I came out as a gay boy to my extended homestead where I grew up. Unfortunately, my coming out made almost no one happy in the family and immediately started cursing and begun to beat me up especially my father.

My father, went on and swore to do more harm to me than before. I continued to live in that environment but under isolation and discrimination and sometimes barely fed. I was forced to walk sometimes and visit some of my other family relatives for food but was still pushed away that I'm evil and couldn't be let to live with other children.

At school where I was finishing my Primary leaving examination, I struggled so much to live with my boyfriend and once we were caught kissing after Saturday classes during the same time. An assembly was made on Monday morning and the two of us were punished and I was expelled from school. My family was not amazed with the fact I was dismissed from school for homosexuality. My father went to claim that I wasn't a child to be raised by other children at home and took me to a Muslim school where he believed I could be taught against my feelings for boys and never visited until I did my final exams. I studied for a short time because I was to only finish my primary.

I joined my secondary after a long talk and abuses with my mother and again dad suggested for a Muslim school. I was admitted at an Islamic secondary school in 2015. In 2018 I was again caught having sex with my new boyfriend in the boys' dormitories on briefing day for our final exams of form four. This time I was severely beaten up as a punishment by my teachers and also dismissed immediately and only to comeback for my final UCE exams. My boyfriend's father even locked him up from their house and was also looking for me. At this time I couldn't head straight home and I spent some days in the sewage tunnels. Life became unbareable and I couldn't live it any longer. I went home later but this time I wasn't allowed to even enter due to the distant noise with threats and abusive words.

In much fear and stigma, i walked to my elder sister's house where I showered and cleaned up. She kept receiving calls from dad that she'll also put herself in danger for my cause. I requested her to allow me stay until I finished my final exams. On realizing that my school days had gone over and never even picked my results because no one could pay money for my school fees, my sister, decided to get me a job and I became a company representative(CR) at Kam plaza Investments in 2019 in the Kampala city center. In November 2019, I had a dispute with the store keeper after i had confessed my feelings for him. He denied and even tried to beat me up hence hit me with a broken glass bottle on my right elbow. I was fired immediately without any payment after discovering I'm gay. I lost my job for being gay. 

I decided to look for ways to earn money, shelter and food, so I started working at a community market opposite a certain petrol station. In February 2020 I was abducted by unknown men who captured me as I moving along the road. I lost conscious immediately and woke up tied up on a chair in the middle of the night darkness. The next morning, three men came and started to beat me up and threaten to kill me because of my sexuality. On the third day, the man who fed me told me that my aunt wanted me dead because I'm bringing shame to the family because I'm gay. He untied me as it was coming to dawn and told me to run very faraway. I didn't even realize where I was but kept running for my life. I met a lady who I told that I was kidnapped. She assisted me with money and I boarded a taxi to Kampala city center at Old taxi park where I spent the night. I couldn't figure out where to go, I managed to convince a taxi driver into letting me be his conductor and he drove along Jinja road to Tororo. 

On our last trip to Malaba, I decided to stay and strive for a life in Tororo district. I was struggling for food in markets and off loading food vehicles for some days but later failed. This was all happening during. 

I tried to call dad but he just swore to cut off my penis and perhaps kill me. And that he's all his effort to look for me anywhere I was. I had no option but find safety at all costs. On 6th/March/2020, I boarded a food vehicle which took me through Uganda-Kenya Malaba boarder customs until we reached a place called Kitale in Kenya. In this new environment, I wasn't able to communicate to almost all the people around but luckily talked to someone at a mosque and told me that he also hears people being helped by the red-cross and he paid a motorcycle and took me at the red-cross Trans-Nzoia branch, Kitale.

On 10th March, 2020 I was brought to Kakuma and arrived the next morning at the camp manager's office with other group of people. I was registered and brought to the reception center. I was registered at the field post on 26th March, 2020 and brought into the community two days after registration.

In Kakuma 3 zone 2 block 2 after days of severe attacks, a general threat on the LGBTIQ people arose and forced many including me to run for my safety to the UNHCR offices in Kakuma. I was loaded and returned to the community at where I have continued to face threats, physical and verbal assaults and almost no resources. With a series of office reports and OB numbers for the assaults.

With these continuing insecurities i am constantly and continuously facing, even till now, that am still facing serious threats and fears, I request everyone to please stand in solidarity with us to find a durable solution and save our lives please, we need you. 

#freeblock13kakuma

Thank you.